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After they'd returned to Lothal, Hera had let Sabine and Zeb handle distributing the supplies among the refugees in Tarkintown. The Ghost had wanted her attention even before their run to Kaller – they were lucky that as eventful as the job had been, it hadn't included dodging TIE squads or other run-ins with the Imperial fleet. She first sets Chopper running general systems diagnostics, while she cleans off old data on the nav computer, then moves on to the engineering station. Chopper sends her the results of the diagnostics, then trundles down from the cockpit to help her lift away the panels for access to the hydraulics system.

She's finishing up the retuning when Chopper alerts her that Kanan and Ezra have returned. Hera only nods, climbing up from the maze of piping and leaving Chopper to reaffix the paneling as she heads down to the loading ramp. Hera hits the button to lower the ramp, opening the ship out onto the warm Lothal evening. She takes a few steps down, stopping short of the high grasses that surround the Ghost, and slips down to sit on the ramp, bending her knees and wrapping her arms around them. There's a light breeze and the tussle of lothcats nearby. And not too far in the distance are the outlines of the freight containers and decommissioned transports that have been converted into the makeshift homes of 'resettlement camp 43.'

And soon, there's the soft brush of footsteps approaching through the grass.

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"Long day, huh," Kanan not-quite-asks, dropping down to sit next to her, at least as long as there's no sign he's unwelcome.

"But we got the job done. Tarkintown'll be all right for at least a little while."

Hera nods, blinking up to him briefly, then back toward the camp in the distance.

"How's your back?"

"Stiff, a little, but it's healing well. It barely even pulls when I move, so -- "

That's what she meant, right?

"I just wish I hadn't let anyone get the drop on me."

"This wasn't a great day for that in general."

Hera sighs, shifting her weight and leaning back. "Where's Ezra?"

"Back at Tarkintown. I think he wanted to get a look at the people we helped. It -- reminds him of why we do this, even when things are hard."

Kanan leans forward, resting his arms on his upraised knees, sighing, too.

She nods, blinking down. Her fingers play along the metal plating of the ramp.

Hera knows she shouldn't do this. If she has something to say, she should just come out with it. And so, she opens her mouth, and -

"I've been running diagnostics on the Ghost." She's shaking her head even as she says it, even as she continues, "I did some work on the hydraulics, but I think..."

She lets it trail off, maybe hoping he'll interrupt her.

"You think . . . ?"

Kanan does interrupt, but trails off at about the same point Hera did. The skin on the back of his neck is prickling, and he knows he wasn't himself on Kaller, knows he made things more complicated for all of them, but --

Confronting it directly is still just that little bit beyond him. So, instead --

"Is that really what you want to talk to me about?"

Hera closes her eyes, thinking over her options. "All right," she answers, slowly.

Still, it's a moment before she speaks again, before she opens her eyes and lifts them to look back at him. "You've been acting strange since we started this job. Since I said we were going to Kaller. You clearly didn't want me around when we were there, then you stick around after -"

She stops. Her voice never rises, but speaks faster, voicing each thought as it comes into her mind, and it's not - that's not why she's saying this. After another pause, her words slower again, "I'm not saying I need an answer, Kanan. But please don't tell me I'm just - imagining this."

Kanan's quiet for a minute, breath coming rough and fast. He finds he can't look at Hera, not at this precise moment.

The past has been so close this whole time, and he's been running from it, even in the middle of the whole thing, and --

"You're not."

It's not torn from him, because he chooses to say it, but it still doesn't come easy.

Hera nods, looking away from him again, not wanting him to feel her eyes on him.

"Okay."

She said she didn't need answers. And it is enough, just hearing him acknowledge it, that it's not just in her head. But she's not sure what to do now.

"I -- "

Kanan looks down at his hands, where they hang loosely between his knees.

"Kaller was the last place I -- "

He breaks off.

"The last place Caleb was actually a Jedi."

She straightens, turning toward him before she can catch herself, though she quickly lowers her eyes again.

"Kanan, I -"

What can she say? She didn't know? Would she have done anything different if she had? Hera knows the answer to that.

Still, she murmurs, "I'm sorry."

"It's over and done. I just haven't . . . "

He shakes his head, still not looking at her.

"I thought I'd run far enough to leave it behind. But I didn't."

Now he does look up at her, mouth quirked in a rueful smile.

"I should have said something, I just didn't know how to. I'm sorry."

She looks back up to him, though she's not quite able to return his smile.

"Was - is there anyone who could have recognized you there?

Kanan hesitates.

"The Governor, but I didn't know that before we got there. And he . . . well. He's not very fond of his planet being occupied, so -- that's probably why we have a new contact? Not that he did recognize me, at least I don't think so. Just -- he could. In theory."

Edited 2018-03-13 03:41 (UTC)

"I guess we'll have to keep that in mind."

Kaller's a strong trade point, and having a sympathetic governor there would definitely be valuable. But also, in this instance, complicated.

She takes a breath, and then, "What did you and Ezra do, after we left?"

"Oh, uh. An old friend of mine -- Kanan's oldest friend -- needed some help. Morfizo of Moraga. He, uh. Apparently he'd joined the Rebellion while I wasn't looking, and the Empire had picked him up. Not that his wife knows I'm a Rebel, just -- it was one hell of a coincidence."

Or, you know. The Force.

"So we took my old ship that Morfizo was keeping safe for me, and uh. Went to Lahn to break him out of prison. You, uh. Remember our old friend Rae Sloane? Turns out she's a Vice Admiral now. That was an unpleasant surprise."

Hera raises her eyebrows, but then shakes her head.

"She'll be a grand admiral at that rate."

Still, with another look to him, "And it also seems like a hell of a coincidence, for her to turn up there."

Kanan just rubs his forehead, shaking his head a little as he does so. And when he looks back up --

"So, the good news is it seems like our plan is working? She definitely thinks I know more than I'm telling, tracked Kanan Jarrus back to Morfizo and arrested him to see if I'd come running."

Score one for their strategy! Um. Kanan grimaces.

"She thinks you're just a pilot."

Hera blinks, her expression blank for a few seconds, before her mouth curves into a small smile. It's -

Most likely wouldn't spot that it's forced.

"Then the plan's working."

And that's what's important. That's what she tells herself.

"At least she'll never see you coming?"

It's weak, and he knows it's weak. But it's why they had the plan in the first place, and --

"Just imagine her face once she figures it out. Not that we want her to figure it out, but -- "

"This is what we wanted."

That she says firmly, allowing no hesitation in her voice now. "It's an opportunity."

Hera lifts her knees again, leaning forward against them. "And we'll use it."

Edited 2018-03-13 04:13 (UTC)

"We will," Kanan agrees promptly. It's what makes this whole charade worth it. It has to.

"Just tell me where you want me."

She looks up to him, some of her hesitation returning.

"I will," she says, more quietly now. "But - you don't have to tell me everything. But I hope you can tell me if something's going to be hard for you."

"I'll try," he says baldly.

"I don't always . . . I don't always realize how bad it's going to be until it's too late. I guess I can try to be less stubborn about that, though."

This may be the only time Kanan admits to being hard-headed.

"I'd appreciate it."

There's a half-smile, not forced this time, and she moves her hand across the ramp's metal plating, toward him.

"Yeah," he says, looking over toward her, even as he reaches out his own hand to take hers.

"I know you would."

"I can't tell you we won't run into this again."

Or that she'd let it determine what jobs they take. "But if I have a heads up I can at least..."

She lets out a breath. "I don't know, plan things differently."

"Where you can," he acknowledges. "Where it won't compromise the mission."

He's still smiling, just a little more crookedly now.

"I know. I'll do my best not to -- take you by surprise like this. So you have time to plan."

It's a promise, one he'll do his damnedest to keep.

"Not that we had a lot of time on this job, anyway," Hera concedes.

"But I'll try not to surprise you, too."

"Thanks," Kanan says simply.

"Maybe between the two of us we'll keep things going smoothly."

The galaxy at large probably has several things to say about that, but still.

She laughs, quietly.

"That might be too much to hope for."

"Could be," he says easily, still smiling.

"But it probably can't hurt to visualize it happening every so often."

"Maybe not," Hera agrees.

"Though that's a little harder knowing we have a vice-admiral after us too, now."

Kanan just had to run his mouth off back on Gorse, didn't he.

"In my defense," Kanan says, "At the time she was just a captain."

He scrubs his hand through his hair, awkwardly.

"Okay, that's not much of a defense."

"And you've definitely gotten better about mouthing off to Imperials."

Or at least, better at judging when the situation calls for it.

"Old age brings wisdom," Kanan says sagely.

(Okay, so to properly quote he'd have to say 'brings wisdom, old age does', and . . . he doesn't really need more reminders of what's gone, just now.)

"That probably still makes us pretty foolish."

With a look back out toward the distance, "But it's good to know we're still learning."

"That's never going to stop, which is another kind of comforting, I guess."

His smile goes crooked, even as he leans back to look outward, as well.

"I know all of us feel ancient some days."

"I know."

She lets them sit in silence then, for just over a minute. Then, she lifts her hand, tapping his before she moves to stand up again.

"I better finish checking up on everything before they get back."

"I'll take the other half of everything," Kanan says, standing up, too.

"I could use some time keeping busy."

It makes it harder to think.

Hera smiles, reaching out toward him again -

But then down trundles Chopper, wondering what exactly has been taking them, there is work to do, and he is not doing it alone.

"All right, all right, we're coming." She does still flash a grin at Kanan, stepping to lead the way ahead of the droid.

"Every time I think he's not the boss of me . . . "

Kanan grins back at her, there and gone by the time Chop starts paying attention to him.

"Hey, I asked for work, buddy, don't you go yelling at me."

He'll bring up the rear, feeling lighter than he did before, even if the memories are still very much at the forefront of his mind. Older and wiser, indeed.

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